By Sylvia Tamale
A groundbreaking publication, available yet scholarly, through African activists. It uses research, lifestyles tales, and inventive expression—including essays, case reports, poetry, information clips, songs, fiction, memoirs, letters, interviews, brief movie scripts, and photographs—to study dominant and deviant sexualities and examine the intersections among intercourse, energy, masculinities, and femininities. It also opens an area, really for teens, to consider African sexualities in numerous methods.
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Extra info for African Sexualities: A Reader
This familiar show of contrition is apparent in the following, a story told by a woman about her twenty-four-yearold husband: REFUSING TO BE A MAN 15 He didn’t only hit me. He bit me and tore my hair. I have a scar on my arm from where he bit a hole out of it one time. The only way to end the beating situation was to become submissive, so it could go on for hours and hours and hours until I couldn’t take it any longer, and I’d end up on the floor a sobbing heap, and then he would continue kicking at me for a while.
Now you can come. Thank god almighty—you have a sex at last. Now, I believe there are many who are sick at heart over what I have been describing. There are many who were born with penises who want to stop collaborating in the sex-class system that needs us to need these kinds of sex. I believe some of you want to stop living out the big lie, and you want to know how. Some of you long to touch truthfully. Some of you want sexual relationships in your life that are about intimacy and joy, ecstasy and equality—not antagonism and alienation.
He looked at me and said, “Don’t make me hurt you” as though I was, by not giving in to him, forcing him to rape me. That’s how he justified the whole thing. 3 This reversal of moral accountability is not an isolated instance; it is a characteristic of nearly all acts that are committed within the ethic of male sexual identity. It is a type of projection, of seeing one’s “wrong” in the person one is wronging, which is the same as saying that one has done no wrong. ” 5 REFUSING TO BE A MAN 13 In the twisted logic of rapist ethics, the victim is ultimately culpable; the victim is the culprit; the victim did the wrong.